Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

Why is a boxing ring square?

How do they get deer to cross at those yellow road signs?

Why don't you ever see the headline Psychic Wins Lottery?

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

How can the weather be "hot as hell" one day and "cold as hell" another?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

Why do they call it a TV "set" when you only get one?

What does it mean if you break a mirror with a rabbit's foot?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called "rush hour"?

If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "asteroids"?

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them?

If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?

How does a shelf salesman keep his store from looking empty?

How many people thought of the Post-It note before it was invented but just didn't have anything to jot it down on?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?

Can someone be a closet claustrophobic?

How do you get off a non-stop flight?

If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?

If you ate pasta and antipasta at the same time, would you still be hungry?

How do you know when you're out of invisible ink?

If the folks at the psychic hotlines were really psychic, wouldn't they call you first?

If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made from?

If "con" is the opposite of "pro," is "Congress" the opposite of "progress"?

Does the reverse side also have a reverse side?

If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed Up?

Why are wrong numbers never busy?

If a lawyer and an IRS agent were drowning, and you could only save one, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

How can there be self-help "groups"?

If it only takes one dollar a day to feed a child in Africa, why does it take two dollars a day to lose weight with Jenny Craig?

Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Are there cemetery workers that dont work the graveyard shift?

How can someone "draw a blank"?

If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

Is there another word for "synonym"?

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic"?

What's another word for "thesaurus"?

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

Can you imagine a world without hypothetical situations?

How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?

Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"? Shouldn't it be called a "near hit"?

What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?

Do Roman paramedics refer to IVs as "Fours"?

Why is it called "after dark," when it is really "after light"?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell "mnemonic"?

Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when were already there?

Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

Are people more violently opposed to fur rather than leather because it's much easier to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs?

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Do bleached blondes pretend to have more fun?

Do chickens think rubber humans are funny?

Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?

How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

If a mute swears, does his mother make him wash his hands with soap?

If a person thinks marathons are superior to sprints, is that racism?

If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is it considered a hostage situation?

If vampires cant see their own reflections, how is it that their hair is always so neat?

If convenience stores are open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and drycleaners depressed?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

Is animal shampoo tested on humans?

Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing nightgowns?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?

Why isn't "phonetic" spelled the way it sounds?

Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

When they ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

What's the speed of dark?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?